Being with couples in a divorce mediation has been a rich experience for me. As a Judge, I saw so little of the people themselves. Only the admissible evidence and the legal arguments came before me in the formality of the courtroom. In a mediation, I see two people involved in a very human struggle, making the transition from a couple to two independent adults. In many cases, one person is farther along that arc than the other.
Fortunately, I see many dedicated attorneys counseling clients in the direction they need to go. And, fortunately, there are so many good resources today. When my parents divorced in the 1960s, my sisters and I were in the dark! No one explained anything to us. We weren’t sure where we would live or go to school. We just waited nervously to see what would happen next. Today there are well researched practices to help families with divorce.
I especially like the advice to tell the children what’s going on. Here’s a great example that I wanted to share.
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